I need more REST!! and...are you content to simply just exist?

FIRST- thanks to Shannen for sharing this with me. At first I thought she was mocking me. But then I quickly realized...she digs my blog. :)
It's not for everyone but when I started this I warned readers what my loves are. Might sound like a broken record from time to time but, HEY, this is MY life no BS.

Another GREAT week gone. What a whirlwind of a crazy week-seems like on weeks where there is a holiday on Monday the week DRAGGSSS. But for some reason this week seemed crazy busy to me.
This week was good for several reasons. I PR'd a few times which is always good. BUT, I was humbled as well.
I always preach about rest. I feel like I am standing in a glass house throwing rocks right now. Tomorrow will be my first "rest" day in 2 weeks. BAD. And I am considering going snowshoeing...double bad. Active recovery I keep telling myself.

HA HA HA HA random but I love this!!

How was I humbled you ask? 2 days of completely sucking at wods that I should have been able to power through. Yesterday I could barely squat clean 135# while I was trying to get a new PR when my old PR is 140. Today the WOD was totally manageable. Air squats, chest to bar and hang snatch. Tough but not complicated, not a high rep scheme. I should have been able to get this one. NOPE. Last one finished today. I don't really care about being last but I do care about struggling through movements and feeling sluggish and tired and sore. Not good EVER! I have to remember..even a badass can get wiped out.

With the Open rapidly approaching I am getting a little crazy and freaked out and I want to make sure that I am doing everything that I can to be ready.But during this time I also need to be smart. The more fatigued you are the more vulnerable you become to injury. I have a goal to finish in the top 100 women in my age group and honestly, as much as I would like to believe this is achievable for me, that self doubt creeps in. Lets be honest. It happens, and if it doesn't happen to you then good damn job but I would hope that most people are humble enough to realize that there are a large number of people with the same hope and desires that you have and it could be the ONE movement that you aren't efficient at that could crush your dream. Seem dramatic? Nope just realistic. 

Back to rest. This has been running through my head. "a body in motion tends to stay in motion.. a body in rest tends to stay in rest"
This has ALSO been running through my head. The CrossFit prescription for rest is 3 days on 1 day off. Why is this so hard for me to do? Could be because I think I am invincible. 

Last night after wodding I was talking with a coach (who also happens to be my sis Kat) about this. She first pointed out that I am too old to only rest 1 day a week, not offended at all by this I own being 46. I earned every dam year of this life the hard way. Secondly she also pointed out that just because a WOD is posted I don't have to do it. I wish that I could just accept this. Right now I am having a super hard time balancing when do I pull back? when do I do a comp WOD vs regular WOD? when do I rest? what happens if I rest and miss a killer WOD? Nothing. What happens if I get injured? enough said right? If you see me. Ask me if I have rested yet this week. I need help folks.


ARE YOU CONTENT SIMPLY EXISTING?
A conversation with a not so close person prompted this rant. 
What would life be like if you had NO goals. If you woke up everyday and your only goal was to make it to the end of the day? I mean I guess if just making it to the end of a day is ok with you then so be it but here is how I live my life.
I may at times live day to day but I never, NEVER will settle for just existing. I get up everyday with the hope and the desire to be better that day than I was yesterday. 
This is easier said but done and is never just workout or eating related. This is in every aspect of my life. Lets face it. I am not getting any younger folks. The one thing I have always had regrets about was that I wasted some years of my life living unhappy and not healthy. And there are times now when I look back at that and wonder what if? what if I had the desire, drive, ambition and mind set back then that I have now? 
Sometimes in life we make not so good choices. We also suffer the consequences of those bad choices. Everyone has shit that happens to them. The reality of that is that you can decide how you are going to let that effect you. Do you let that guide your path into self destruction? Hell NO. You have to use that experience to push you to make better choices, to change what you might think is unchangeable, you learn and you grow and then you do NOT make that choice again. It appears to be simple but I know how hard it is.
I feel bad for people that feel like if their life is in the shitter there is nothing they can do with it and they use terms like "well this is the card I was dealt" WHAT A FREAKING CROCK OF SHIT. Sorry Mom about my cussing if you read this. I am kind of passionate about this topic. When I play cards there is usually DISCARD pile. You don't have to keep that card. You can throw it away and move the efff on. It's rarely easy and it could possibly be very lonely.
My advise. Surround yourself with people who have the same goals and desires that you have. Surround yourself with people who are positive and motivated. Avoid the bottom feeders and the "bring you downers". Could you imagine being around a group of people who actually pushed you to be better and supported you? 
I don't have to imagine it. I do it. I like to refer to them as suckers. And I mean this in the nicest way. Granted I have met many of these people at the box I CrossFit at. That's the funny thing. They don't show up and simply exist. They show up with 1 goal. To be better today than they were yesterday and I am not talking about just having a better FRAN time...
I really like hanging around with with people who aren't content to simply exist...don't you?

Just handing around with people who want to just be better. Amanda, Alyssa, Jo and Myself